So what's it gonna be? All smiles and fake? All the pretending can't undo most things.

I am leaving for Nepal tomorrow at dawn and while I must say I will miss a few special people, I hope it'll be good chance for me to find myself again. I need the peace and the calm, away from busy city life to help me find a sense of what it is to be put in this world. I've realized that is possible that being away from people besides my family is what is going to help me reach my peak again, just like where I once was.

Despite what I've said about losing my fighting spirit, I really feel that Nat is the only friend I'd truly fight for, and faith will tie us together to preserve this lovely, special friendship.

Attraction

To me there are two kinds of beauty, I think.

One is the in-your-face kind, the one that takes your breath away the first time you set your eyes on them, with features set so stark and sharp and melts a couple hundred hearts. The common good looks.With an air of grace and elegance that surrounds them; they are so sure, so confident, so proud of their looks. But it fades the more you stare at them, makes you realize they appear ordinary in fact, there's nothing remotely special or interesting nor unconventional about the way their face has been molded- until the next time you see them again.

The second is the more endearing kind. The plain Janes. The kind you'd never notice or think much of if you ever walked past them. Most wouldn't give a second glance, and that's the beauty of it. It takes that one person to look at them from afar, notice how their face lights up with a transcendent glow whenever they smile or laugh; the kind of beauty that grows the more you look at them- they get more and more beautiful the more you see them- and they don't ever realize how mesmerizing they actually are to the eyes of the onlookers who stopped to watch them bloom.